I Can Feel You Falling
by cordano-carby
Summary: -THIS FIC IS NOW COMPLETED- Cordano friendship-possible romance, late season 9. Finally uploaded chapter 15- part two of the two-part conclusion. It's the conversation you've all been waiting for... Please read and review, this one last time...
1. The Call

Author's Note: Well, those of you who know me know that I am a huge Cordano 'shipper, and I'm sure you all have been wondering when I'm going to write a Cordano fic. Well, this is it, and I'm sure it won't be the last. It's not a romance, but it certainly could be headed that way. This is a post-ep for "Finders Keepers," picking up right where it left off. It'll probably be continued into a series, because I actually have some ideas. Please read and review- constructive criticism is great. Enjoy!  
  
Oh, I know absolutely nothing about Chicago geography. Just to let you know. And the title is from the song "Here is Gone" by the Goo Goo Dolls.  
  
***  
  
Robert Romano slowly opened his eyes. The left side of his face was throbbing with pain. Reaching up with his good arm, Robert gingerly touched his cheek. Swollen. Moving down towards his jaw, he realized that he was bleeding. Hastily wiping his hand off on his pants, Robert struggled to sit up.  
  
His head was swimming with pain. Had he lost consciousness? He couldn't remember. "Ha!" he thought to himself. "You can't remember if you passed out. That means you probably did. You should know that, you're one of the best surgeons to ever walk the halls of that stupid hospital."  
  
Was. He used to be the best surgeon at County General. Chief of Surgery, Chief of Staff. He could perform almost any procedure with confidence, ease, and an unfailing sense of humor. But where was he now? Chief of the dysfunctional ER. Replaced as Chief of Staff by the devil's advocate herself, Kerry Weaver. Unable to perform surgery. Walking around with one useless arm bundled in a sling. Picking -and losing- fights in bars.  
  
Robert hadn't even realized that he was sitting alone. His attackers were back at the bar, drinking and watching that same pointless show. "Cowards," Romano thought to himself. "They beat up some guy who can't even defend himself, and now they won't even acknowledge me." The pain had subsided a little bit, and Robert pushed himself up off of the bar floor. After he had regained his balance, he placed a few bills on the counter and walked towards the bathroom.  
  
Looking at his face in the mirror, Robert was amazed at just how bad he looked. How the hell had he gotten here? Less than a year ago, he had been on top of the world. Then one stupid chart had fallen off a gurney, and his life had been changed forever. All he could remember of the next two weeks was pain- both the sharp, constant pain in his arm, and the lingering ache that told him that he probably would never be able to perform surgery again.  
  
Turning on the faucet, Robert splashed a bit of water on his face. He dampened a paper towel and tried to wipe away the blood trickling down his cheek. He winced as he applied pressure to the wound. Sinking down in the corner of the bathroom, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Though he wanted so badly to cry, he didn't. Robert Romano was not a crier.  
  
After a few minutes, Robert got up. His head ached, his arm throbbed, his drunken state was wearing off, and he was exhausted. There was no way he was going to get home by himself tonight. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, not knowing who to call. After mulling it over for a few minutes, he rummaged around in his wallet for a piece of paper. He unfolded it and punched the numbers into the phone.  
  
***  
  
Elizabeth Corday was sitting on the El platform, waiting for a train to come. It was almost 10 o'clock, and the trains were few and far between. All in all, it had been a bad day. Sure, there was a tough case that she had to handle, but mostly, she was worried about Robert. He seemed broken and lost, but the face he was putting up was offending the entire emergency department. He wasn't going to last very long if he kept this act up.  
  
Suddenly, her cell phone rang. Elizabeth assumed that it was her nanny, calling to find out why she was so late. Rummaging around in her bag for the phone, she pulled it out and flipped it open. The number displayed on the caller ID was unfamiliar. Elizabeth hesitantly answered the phone.  
  
"Hello?" The line was silent for a few seconds. Elizabeth rolled her eyes and tried again. "Hello? Is anybody there?"  
  
"Elizabeth?" The voice was soft, but Elizabeth was sure she recognized it.  
  
"Robert? Is that you? What happened?"  
  
"Elizabeth, I know this sounds.weird, but I need you to come pick me up. I can't get home by myself."  
  
Thoughts raced through Elizabeth's mind as a train rumbled up to the platform. "Where are you, Robert?"  
  
"I'm at a bar at 43rd and Clark. It's called O'Reilly's."  
  
Elizabeth took a deep breath. Was he hurt? Lonely? Or just drunk?  
  
Did it matter?  
  
"Okay, Robert, I'll be there in fifteen minutes," she said, getting onto the train.  
  
"Thank you, Elizabeth." Robert's voice sounded weak and far away. Elizabeth ended the call, and dialed her home phone number.  
  
"Chris? It's me. I'm going to be a little bit later than I thought."  
  
***  
  
Robert held the phone long after Elizabeth had hung up. Finally, he realized that she would be here soon. Summoning all his strength, he shakily stood up, gripping the sink. The pain and exhaustion was becoming too much.  
  
Somehow, Robert managed to make it out of the bathroom. It had been his intention to wait for Elizabeth outside, but the pain was too great. Sinking down in a chair along the far wall, Robert closed his eyes and waited for Elizabeth to come.  
  
***  
  
'O'Reilly's.O'Reilly's." Elizabeth murmured to herself, walking briskly along the cold Chicago street. Finally, she spotted the bar. Before she entered the bar, she took a deep breath, trying to compose herself.  
  
It was no use. Elizabeth pushed open the door to the bar, and she was immediately overwhelmed with smoke and loud conversation. Looking around, she couldn't see Robert anywhere. Was this the wrong place? Finally, after several long seconds of searching, she saw him. He was sitting in the far corner, eyes closed, face grimaced in pain. Elizabeth hurriedly walked toward him. His cheek was swollen, and blood trickled from a cut near his lip. She sat down in the chair next to Robert, and shook him gently.  
  
"Robert? What happened?"  
  
Robert's eyes lazily opened to see Elizabeth tenderly touching his cheek.  
  
"Apparently drunken men aren't as friendly as I remembered."  
  
Elizabeth picked up a napkin and put pressure on the cut. The bleeding began to slow down. "Did you get beat up?" Robert weakly nodded.  
  
Elizabeth bit her lip. Robert was obviously hurt- both physically from getting beat up, and mentally because of.well, everything. Who knows what he would do if he was left alone tonight? But did she really want to follow her gut instinct?  
  
Pushing the consequences out of her mind, Elizabeth gently slipped Robert's good arm around her shoulder. "Come on, Robert, let's get you home."  
  
Robert opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, Elizabeth silenced him.  
  
"My home." 


	2. Talk to Me

Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far- it's always nice to get such positive feedback. Please continue with the reading and reviewing!  
  
***  
  
Elizabeth quietly pushed open the door to her house. It was past eleven, and she didn't want to wake Chris if she had fallen asleep. As she had suspected, Chris lay on the living room couch with a blanket tucked around her. Elizabeth leaned over and gently tapped her shoulder.  
  
"Chris? I'm home."  
  
Chris opened her eyes and sat up. "Hi, Elizabeth. How was your day?"  
  
"Horrible. I'm sorry I'm so late, surgery went long."  
  
"Don't worry about it."  
  
"So, how did things go today?"  
  
Chris walked over to the door and slipped on her shoes. "Fine. Ella seemed a little tired, though."  
  
Elizabeth nodded. "She was up late last night. I had to run in to work, so we didn't get home until nine. Did she nap?"  
  
"Yeah, three hours this afternoon."  
  
"Wow!"  
  
Chris laughed. "I know, it's uncharacteristic. I put her to bed around 7:45."  
  
"Great. Thanks so much, Chris."  
  
"My pleasure. What time should I be here tomorrow?"  
  
"Oh, take tomorrow off. I'm not going in until noon, and I can bring Ella to daycare."  
  
"Thanks, Elizabeth. See you Saturday, then."  
  
"Saturday. Have a good night, Chris." With that, Chris let herself out.  
  
Elizabeth quietly walked up the stairs to her daughter's room. When she entered and saw the small figure asleep in her crib, she was reminded of the man who was sitting on the back porch, too embarrassed to show his face to the nanny. Elizabeth smoothed Ella's hair, rearranged her blankets, and gave her a light kiss on the forehead. She then tiptoed down the stairs and out the back door.  
  
Robert sat on the steps of the porch, shivering a little bit. The night was cool and breezy. He stared blankly out into the backyard, mindlessly picking up pebbles and tossing them into the grass. His daze was broken by a voice from behind him.  
  
"I bet you can get it in the sandbox."  
  
Robert smiled slightly and picked up a larger pebble. Gathering all his strength, he threw the pebble into the night. There was a faint clunk as the pebble hit the side of the sandbox and bounced in. "Lucky shot," he muttered.  
  
Pulling her jacket tighter around her, Elizabeth sat down on the steps next to Robert. "It's a beautiful night." Robert nodded.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Elizabeth turned to face him. His cheeks were pale and swollen, and the cut on his jaw was beginning to scab over. But his eyes told everything. They did not have the spirit that she had always associated with her friend and colleague. They were tired. They exposed a man broken inside. Elizabeth couldn't understand why nobody else had noticed it. Just one look should have told everybody how much this man was hurting. But apparently, nobody else cared.  
  
"Robert?" Hearing his name, he turned to face Elizabeth. "You know you can always talk to me. About anything."  
  
Robert sighed, throwing another pebble into the night. "Why do you think I called you tonight?"  
  
Elizabeth bit her lip and tried again. "I'm glad you called me, Robert. I've been worried about you. I don't want you to get hurt any more than you already are."  
  
"I wish more people felt that way."  
  
Elizabeth was almost scared at the tone of his voice. This was not the Robert Romano she knew. "Do you want to talk about anything?"  
  
"You know what, Elizabeth? It's been a long day. I don't really want to talk about anything right now." He threw one last pebble, and then began to get up. "Maybe I should go."  
  
"Robert, no. I'm not going to let you go home tonight. Come inside, and I'll make up a bed for you. I'll get you some of Mark's old pajamas, and I'm sure we have an extra toothbrush around somewhere."  
  
Robert looked down at his feet. "Thank you, Elizabeth."  
  
Elizabeth got up and opened the door to the house, holding it open as Robert shuffled inside.  
  
***  
  
Elizabeth fluffed up the pillows on the guest room bed. It had been Rachel's room, but after she moved out, Elizabeth had it painted and turned into a guest room. She smoothed out the comforter and placed an extra blanket at the end of the bed.  
  
Robert walked into the bedroom. Elizabeth had found him an old T-shirt and a pair of flannel pants. The T-shirt was hers, but the pants had been Mark's. They were baggy on Robert, and they dragged on the floor as he walked. Elizabeth couldn't help but smile.  
  
"Do you need anything, Robert? Can I get you some Tylenol?"  
  
Robert sighed as he sunk down on the bed. "Please."  
  
Elizabeth nodded and left the room. Robert rubbed his temples. He couldn't believe that he was sitting here, in Elizabeth Corday's guest room. He hadn't expected the night to end like this. In fact, he had expected to fall asleep at the bar, only to be kicked out onto the street with no place to go after last call. "This is a much more comfortable way to spend the night," he thought to himself, as he slid under the sheets.  
  
Elizabeth soon returned with a glass of water and two pills. She dumped the pills into Robert's outstretched hand, and placed the glass of water on the nightstand. "Is there anything else you need?" Robert shook his head, chasing the pills down with a sip of water.  
  
"No, Elizabeth, I'm fine."  
  
Elizabeth nodded and walked towards the door. "Okay, then I'll be going up to bed. My bedroom is upstairs, at the end of the hall to the right. If you need anything at all, come up and get me. Do you have a shift tomorrow?" Robert nodded. "What time?"  
  
"Eight."  
  
Elizabeth sighed. "You're not going in tomorrow, Robert."  
  
"But I have to-"  
  
"Well, I'll come down and wake you at seven. We'll see how you feel then." Robert nodded weakly, sliding further under the covers.  
  
"Sleep well, Robert. See you in the morning." She then turned off the light and began to leave.  
  
"Elizabeth?"  
  
Elizabeth turned around.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
Elizabeth smiled. "You're welcome, Robert. Good night." She shut the door and walked up to her own bedroom. 


	3. The Morning After

Author's Note: Well, this is a happier chapter, since it's Easter and I'm in a good mood (the Easter bunny brought lots of chocolate to my house this morning). I really appreciate all the reviews I've gotten so far- the more feedback, the better. Keep that in mind after you read the chapter :) Enjoy!  
  
***  
  
"Beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-b-" The incessant beeping of the alarm clock stopped when Elizabeth finally found the snooze button. Slowly opening her eyes, she rolled over to look at the alarm clock. 6:45. Elizabeth groaned and threw back the sheets. She swung her legs over the side of the bed and slid her feet into her slippers. Reaching for her bathrobe, she walked into the bathroom.  
  
Elizabeth lazily unwound her thick hair from the braid she slept in. Holding it back with one hand, she wet a washcloth with the other and wiped her face. The cold water woke her up a little bit. She filled a glass with cold water and drank it before leaving the bathroom to go downstairs.  
  
When she passed her daughter's room, Elizabeth paused and quietly pushed open the door. Ella was standing up in her crib, and when she saw her mother, she began to bang on the sides. Elizabeth laughed as she crossed the room and lifted Ella out of the crib and onto her hip. "We're going to have to get you a big-girl bed soon, darling." Ella smiled and nodded enthusiastically.  
  
Now with Ella in tow, Elizabeth went downstairs and knocked on the half- open door to the guest room. There was no response. Elizabeth pushed the door open all the way. Robert lay on the bed, wrapped up in the sheets. He looked so peaceful when he slept- there was no pain on his face or in his eyes. Elizabeth put Ella on the ground. "Go into the living room, sweetheart. I'll be right there." Ella ran off, and Elizabeth silently entered the room.  
  
Cautiously avoiding the lifeless arm that was propped up on a pillow, Elizabeth gently shook Robert's shoulder. "Robert? It's ten minutes to seven."  
  
Robert's eyes opened. He was surprised to see Elizabeth at first, but the memories of the previous night soon came rushing back. He sat up in bed. His arm ached, and his head throbbed, a constant reminder of the night before. "Good morning."  
  
"Good morning, Robert. How are you feeling?"  
  
"Fine," Robert said, looking Elizabeth straight in the eye. Her crystal blue eyes asked him doubtful questions, and Robert looked down. "Not so fine."  
  
"How's your arm?"  
  
"Still hurts like hell."  
  
"Do you want something stronger than Tylenol?"  
  
Robert shook his head. "No. Tylenol is fine."  
  
Elizabeth nodded. "I'll get you some." She left the room and went into the kitchen, where she kept a bottle of Tylenol in one of the cabinets. As she shook two caplets out of the bottle, Elizabeth glanced into the living room. Ella was sitting on the floor, looking at a picture book. When she saw her mother, she jumped up and ran to her.  
  
"Mommy!"  
  
Elizabeth scooped her up in one arm and planted a kiss on her forehead. "I love you, Ella."  
  
"Where are you going?"  
  
"Mommy's friend had to stay here last night, and his arm hurts. I'm going to bring him some medicine."  
  
"Can I come?"  
  
"Of course, darling." She walked into the guest room again and placed the pills on the nightstand.  
  
"Ella, this is my friend." She paused, not sure how to introduce Robert.  
  
"Robert," Robert finished quickly. "How are you, Ella?"  
  
Ella buried her head in Elizabeth's shoulder. Elizabeth laughed. "She's still a bit shy around strangers. She'll open up in no time, I can guarantee that." She sat down on the bed. "So, do you think you're up for work this morning?"  
  
Robert paused. He really didn't want to go into work. Spending twelve hours in the busy ER would not make his headache any better. But he was tempted to go anyway. He didn't want Elizabeth to think he was weak.  
  
He looked at Elizabeth, ready to tell her, against his better judgment, that he would go into work. When he saw her eyes, he suddenly changed his mind. She already knew that he was weak- she didn't care. She also already knew that he was in no condition to go to work. He took a deep breath.  
  
"No. Those incompetent ER hooligans will just have to fend for themselves today."  
  
Elizabeth smiled. "I'm glad you're not going in today. You look like hell."  
  
"Thank you, Lizzie, I really appreciate that."  
  
Elizabeth laughed. "Well, you do."  
  
Robert smiled. "As opposed to who? You? The morning breath is very attractive."  
  
Elizabeth self-consciously brought her hand up to her mouth. "I need to brush my teeth."  
  
Robert laughed. "No, it's really not that bad, Lizzie."  
  
Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "Can I get you some coffee?"  
  
Robert nodded. "I've got to go to the bathroom anyway. I can't remember, is there a shower in there?"  
  
"Yes. There are some towels hanging on the rack behind the door, and there should be some soap in there."  
  
"Thanks, Lizzie," Robert said, as he got out of bed, grabbing his clothes from the night before.  
  
"Here, let me get you a clean shirt, Robert."  
  
"Thank you." Elizabeth went upstairs to find a shirt, and Robert walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower.  
  
***  
  
Twenty minutes later, Robert emerged from the bathroom. Elizabeth poured him a cup of coffee, and continued cutting up a banana for Ella. Robert sat down at the kitchen table across from Ella, who was eating Cheerios.  
  
"How are those Cheerios, Ella?"  
  
"Good," Ella said, shyly.  
  
"You know, I could use some Cheerios about now." Robert said, hinting to Elizabeth.  
  
"Robert, would you like something to eat?"  
  
"I'll have what the young lady is having," he said, winking at Ella. Ella giggled.  
  
Elizabeth poured two bowls of Cheerios and sat down at the table between Robert and Ella. "Do you want milk on your cereal, Robert?" He nodded. "Okay, I'll get you some."  
  
"You know, I'm a grown man. I'm perfectly capable of getting milk out of a refrigerator and pouring it on my cereal. In fact, since I'm such a gentleman, I'll even pour some on your cereal if you so desire."  
  
Elizabeth leaned back in her chair and smiled as Robert got the carton of milk out of the refrigerator and poured some on her cereal. He looked much better this morning. A bruise was beginning to form around his eye, but he seemed much cheerier.  
  
"So, Lizzie. Are you working today?"  
  
"I have a meeting at two, and I have to catch up on some paperwork. I don't have any surgeries scheduled, though. And speaking of work, Robert, you should call in sick. They'll be expecting you soon."  
  
Robert nodded. "Where's the phone?" Elizabeth tipped her chair back and grabbed the cordless from the kitchen counter. Robert punched in the number for the County ER desk and waited for someone to pick up. After three rings, he finally heard a voice on the other end.  
  
"County General emergency department."  
  
"Jerry, I hope you pick up calls from dying people faster than you picked up mine."  
  
On the other end of the line, Jerry sighed. "Dr. Romano. How are you on this fine morning?"  
  
"Not so great, Jerry, but thanks for the fake enthusiasm. I'm a little under the weather today, so I won't be coming in. Call up to Weaver's office and tell her to get her ass down there to help you out."  
  
"Okay, Dr. Romano. I hope you feel bet-" Jerry was interrupted when Robert hung up.  
  
"I now have the day off," Robert said.  
  
"Well, why don't you stick around here this morning, and I'll drop you off at your house on my way in to work?"  
  
Robert took a sip of his coffee. "Sounds like a plan." 


	4. A Meeting

Author's Note: No Cordano interaction in this chapter (sorry guys) but I promise there is much more to come. I really appreciate all the feedback I've gotten so far, please keep it coming!  
  
***  
  
"Hi, Shirley," Elizabeth said, greeting the nurse who was standing behind the surgical admit desk.  
  
"Hello, Dr. Corday. I didn't think you were coming in today."  
  
Elizabeth stopped at the desk to fill out some quick forms. "Well, I have a meeting with Kerry Weaver at two, and I thought I'd get caught up on some paperwork. Ella needed to get out of the house anyway."  
  
"Do you want me to page you when Kerry comes up?"  
  
"That would be wonderful, thank you, Shirley. I'll be in my office." Elizabeth picked up her bag and walked down the hall into her office. Everything in the small room was just as she had left it. Dictations and chart reviews were piled high on her desk. Elizabeth sighed, sat down, and took the first chart off of the stack.  
  
***  
  
Robert sat down on the couch and flipped on the television. After channel- surfing for a few minutes, he came across "General Hospital". Robert chuckled to himself and propped his feet up on the table. He reached for the bowl of popcorn that he had made, and let himself get lost in the pathetic lives of the soap opera characters.  
  
***  
  
Elizabeth came out of her daze when her pager began to beep. She had spent the last two hours writing chart review after chart review, and she hadn't even noticed that it was time for her meeting. Elizabeth got up and left her office. Shirley was still sitting at the desk. "Where did Kerry want to meet, Shirley?" Elizabeth asked.  
  
"Her office, I think," Shirley said.  
  
Elizabeth nodded and walked to Kerry's new office. She knocked on the door and stepped inside. The office looked completely different than it had just a week ago. The pictures that had graced the walls had been taken down and replaced by new and unfamiliar pieces of artwork. The stacks of charts were gone, and the pile of scrubs that always sat behind the desk was no longer there. Everything was neat and organized. Elizabeth sighed, and Kerry looked up from her work.  
  
"Elizabeth. I'm glad you could make it. I'm sorry to have called you here on your day off."  
  
"It's all right, really," Elizabeth said. "Ella needed to get out of the house anyway."  
  
"Sit down," Kerry said, gesturing to the couch. Elizabeth sat down as Kerry crossed the room and leaned against her desk. "How is Ella?"  
  
"She's doing quite well. She just turned two a few weeks ago, and she's really starting to develop her own personality. Naturally, she got my stubborn streak," Elizabeth said, smiling.  
  
Kerry chuckled. "Good, I'm glad to hear she's doing well. Do you get to see her often?"  
  
"Well, I have to work pretty long hours, as you know, but I do get to see her a lot. Chris, her nanny, will sometimes bring her down here during my lunch break, or I'll bring Ella here for the day if I don't have many surgeries scheduled. And I always get Saturdays off, which is nice."  
  
"Good. I know there are many doctors who don't get to see their kids nearly as much as they would like to."  
  
Elizabeth nodded. "Well, my situation is a bit different. Most of the doctors who are parents have a husband or wife to depend on. I don't."  
  
Kerry looked down, unsure of how to respond. She decided to just avoid the topic. "Well, I don't want to keep you from your daughter any more than I have to, so I suppose I should just get straight to the point."  
  
Elizabeth sat up straighter in her seat and adjusted her skirt. "Yes?"  
  
"Well, as you know, Dr. Romano is no longer able to perform his surgical duties, and he's been moved to the ER. Since he can't perform surgery anymore, he can't be Chief of Surgery anymore. It just doesn't make sense." Elizabeth opened her mouth to say something, but Kerry put up a hand to silence her. "You've been Associate Chief of Surgery for more than three years now, and we think you'd been a excellent candidate for Chief of Surgery. So I'm offering you the position of Interim Chief. If you take it, it is more than likely that you will be offered the permanent position."  
  
Elizabeth was silent. She wasn't sure if she wanted the responsibility of being chief of the department. Sure, she had been associate chief for years, but it had been different being Robert's right-hand person. She had responsibilities, but Robert had always taken care of the tough situations and made sure that her workload was manageable. If she was in charge, she wouldn't have that luxury anymore.  
  
Plus, she would be taking Robert's job. Robert Romano was the one who had brought her to County in the first place. Sure, they had had their differences in the past, but they were friends. Robert had taught her so much about surgery, and had helped her get where she was now. Elizabeth wasn't sure if she could take this job without feeling extremely guilty.  
  
"Well?" Kerry said. Elizabeth looked at her with a bit of contempt. She was sure that Kerry just wanted Robert out, and revoking his Chief of Surgery status was a big step on the way to getting Robert out of County for good.  
  
Elizabeth took a deep breath. "I'm honored that you would think of me, Kerry. I'll have to think about it."  
  
Kerry nodded. "Just let me know by Monday, okay?"  
  
Elizabeth nodded. "Is there anything else, Kerry?"  
  
Kerry shook her head. "Thank you for coming, Elizabeth. I hope you will take the position- you'd be a wonderful Chief." Elizabeth smiled politely and let herself out of the office. She walked briskly to the elevator and jabbed the down button. When the elevator doors opened, she got inside and pressed 4, the floor that daycare was on. As the doors slid shut in front of her face, closing out the surgical floor from her gaze, Elizabeth slowly let out her breath. She had a lot of thinking to do. 


	5. Things to Think About

Author's Note: Sorry it took a while to get this chapter up- I didn't have much time at all last week to write. Hopefully the next chapter will be up sooner rather than later.  This chapter is still in the time between "Finders Keepers" and "Things Change". I'm going to try to tie in events from the more current episodes in future chapters, but I'm not there yet. Anyway, I'd appreciate any feedback. Enjoy!

***

"Mommy, I want the rubber duckie!" Ella said, slapping her hands down on the bath water. Elizabeth reached across the tub and gave her the squeaky yellow toy, then poured some shampoo into her hand and began to wash her daughter's hair.

"Close your eyes, darling," she said as she poured water over her daughter's soapy head. Ella tightly squeezed her eyes shut, and shampoo trickled down her face. When Elizabeth was sure that she had gotten out all the shampoo, she reached down and tickled her daughter's stomach. Ella began to giggle, keeping her eyes shut tightly. When Elizabeth bent down and kissed her nose, Ella opened her eyes and laughed even more.

"What's so funny, Ella?" Ella pointed at Elizabeth's nose. Elizabeth reached up to see what was so funny, and brushed off some bubbles that were sitting on the end of her nose. She smiled, and Ella kept laughing. Elizabeth got up off of the bathroom floor and reached for a towel. She held it open as Ella climbed out of the bathtub. Elizabeth wrapped her daughter up in the towel, drying her dripping hair. She then picked Ella up and carried her into her bedroom.

After getting Ella into her pajamas, brushing her hair, and reading her three bedtime stories, Elizabeth turned off the light and went downstairs, leaving her daughter's door open slightly. It was 7:30 on a Friday night, and here she was, alone in her living room as usual. Elizabeth went into the kitchen and got a carton of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream out of the freezer. Spoon in hand, she sat down on the living room couch and opened the carton. Elizabeth picked up the remote, planning to turn on the television, but decided to turn on the stereo instead. 

Elizabeth leaned back and propped her feet up on the table in front of her. She opened the ice cream and scooped up a spoonful. As she ate the first refreshing bite, she laughed to herself. This was something she used to do when studying for exams during medical school- she hadn't sat down with a full carton of ice cream in years. Elizabeth dug spoonful after spoonful out of the carton, and began to debate with herself. 

After half an hour of thinking about her meeting with Kerry, Elizabeth got up from the couch and picked up the cordless phone from the kitchen. There was only one way to make this decision. Sitting back down on the couch, she dialed Robert's home phone number. 

***

Robert slowly unwound the dressing from his arm. He couldn't help but wince when he saw the beginnings of an ulcer. It looked bad, but he wasn't willing to admit that to anyone else. Not yet, at least. 

As he began to rewrap the wound, he heard the phone ring. Walking out of the bathroom into the kitchen, he picked up the phone and placed it between his ear and neck.

"Hello?"

"Robert? I'm sorry to be calling you at home, but-"

"Wait…Elizabeth? Is that you?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. Yes, it's me."

Robert sat down at the kitchen table. "How was your day? I wasn't expecting to hear from you tonight. Checking up on me, I assume?"

Dozens of blocks away, Elizabeth's eyes widened. "No, Robert, not at all. I called for a different reason. But since you brought it up, how are you?"

"I'm doing all right. Damn arm still hurts, but I'm used to that by now."

"Doing better than last night, I suppose?"

"Yes, definitely."

Elizabeth nodded. "Good. I'm glad."

There was a pause. Neither of them was quite sure what to say. Phone conversations weren't a normal occurrence between the two of them. In fact, Robert couldn't remember the last time Elizabeth had called him at home. Finally, he broke the silence.

"Well, you said you called for a reason. Care to share it?"

Elizabeth took a breath to compose herself. "I had a meeting with Kerry Weaver today."

Robert gave a small laugh. "Well, there's an enthusiastic way to start a story."

"Yes, yes, I know. Anyway, Kerry…er…well, she offered me the position of Interim Chief of Surgery."

Robert was taken aback. Kerry was offering other people that job? _His job? _

"Well, nice to know that she has faith in my recovery. I guess this means I'm banished to the ER forever, then."

"Robert, I'm sorry, I was as surprised as you are. I was sure this was going to be a temporary move too."

"Well, did you accept the job?"

"No, I haven't. Not yet, at least. That's why I called. I wanted to get your input."

"I'm touched, Lizzie, really," Robert said. Elizabeth smiled at his mocking tone of voice. 

"Well?"

Robert took a deep breath. "Elizabeth, you would make a wonderful chief. You've got surgical talent, and people skills and bedside manner to match. If someone has to have my job, I want it to be you."

"So you think I should take it then?"

"Yes, Lizzie, I think you should take it. You'll probably do a better job than I ever did."

"You were a great chief of surgery, Robert. And you will be a good ER chief too. You just have to learn that they don't enjoy being bossed around as much down there as they do in surgery."

Robert smiled. "Yeah, I kind of made a fool of myself yesterday, didn't I?"

"Well, to put it frankly, yes. You may want to reconsider your approach to emergency medicine before you have a mutiny down there."

"I'll have to work on that tomorrow."

"You're going back in tomorrow, then? You're feeling up to it?"

"Yes, I think I am, thanks to wonderful Nurse Corday."

"Ha, ha, ha," Elizabeth said. She and Robert both laughed. 

"Well, thank you, Robert. I'll tell Kerry my decision tomorrow."

"So you're going to take the position?"

"Yes, I am."

"Good."

"So, I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"Yes. And Elizabeth?"

"Yes, Robert?"

"We should do this more often."

"Do what?"

"This whole talking thing. I really enjoyed our conversation."

"Me too." Elizabeth heard a whimper from upstairs. "Robert, I have to go, Ella's crying for me."

"I don't want to keep you from your daughter. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Right. And thank you, Robert."

"You're welcome." Robert heard the click of the receiver and then the harsh dial tone.  

Robert hung up the phone and got himself a glass of water. The conversation he had just had certainly gave him a lot to think about. Not just about his future at County- though he now certainly had doubts about it.  He had forgotten how much he enjoyed talking to her. 

Robert finished his water and set the glass next to the sink. He smiled, and walked upstairs to do some work.

***

Elizabeth hung up the phone and jogged upstairs to Ella's bedroom. Ella was sitting up in her crib.

"What's the matter, darling?"

"I want water."

Elizabeth reached over to the dresser, where a sippy cup sat, full of water. "Here you go, Ella."

Ella took a long drink from the cup. "Thank you, mommy," she said, handing her the cup. Elizabeth took the cup and set it back down on the dresser. 

"All right, darling. Now go to sleep," she said, smoothing Ella's hair back from her forehead. Ella's eyes closed, and her breathing became slower as she fell asleep again. Elizabeth sat down in the rocking chair in the corner of the room and began to rock back and forth. 

She was going to take the position of Chief of Surgery, and her conversation with Robert had made her sure of it. That conversation had also reminded her how much she valued him as a friend. He had said that they should talk more often. Elizabeth told herself that he was right about that before drifting off to sleep.


	6. Rumor Mill

Author's Note: This chapter takes place the day after "Things Change," so it takes those events into account. And yes, I am going to take all of season 9 into account by the end of the fic, but I'm not quite there yet. Anyway, thanks for all of the great reviews- keep them coming! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: My knowledge of medicine comes from ER. I've done my best, but don't sue me if it's completely inaccurate. 

***

Elizabeth pushed open the doors to Trauma 1. Susan, Gallant, Abby, Lydia and Robert surrounded the patient, a 17-year-old stabbing victim. 

"Someone called for a consult?"

Robert stepped back from the bed to talk to Elizabeth. "Megan Winer, 17, multiple stab wounds to the chest and abdomen. Possible spleen injury. BP is 120 over 80; pulse ox is 98 on 75 percent oxygen." Elizabeth nodded, put on her trauma glasses, and began to assess the patient.

Ten minutes later, when the girl had been stabilized, Elizabeth and Robert wheeled her out of the room and over to the elevators. After waiting a few seconds, the elevator doors opened and they wheeled Megan inside. Robert punched the button for surgery as the elevator doors shut.

"So, how are you, Robert?"

Robert turned around and leaned against the side of the elevator. Elizabeth was standing next to Megan's head, bagging her. Her trauma gown was covered in blood, but she was smiling.

"I'm doing much better. Learning how to avoid pissing the ER staff off."

Elizabeth laughed. "Well, that's always a good thing." Robert nodded. "How's that ulcer?"

Robert looked down at his arm. "It's better than it was yesterday. The wound debridement really helped."

Elizabeth nodded. "Good, I'm glad. I want to take another look at it later." 

"Okay."

The elevator stopped and the doors slid open. Robert stood up and grabbed the end of the gurney with his good hand, and helped Elizabeth wheel the patient into the OR. Shirley took over bagging, and Elizabeth pulled off her bloody trauma gown.

"So you've got it from here, Lizzie?"

Elizabeth nodded. "Thank you, Robert!" she said, as she walked into the scrub room. Robert hesitated for a moment, then turned to go back down to the ER.

***

"Suction!" Elizabeth called, as she began to clamp off the spleen. The assisting resident obliged. "Shirley, what's the pulse ox?"

"96 on 90% oxygen, Dr. Corday."

"Thank you." 

There was a silence in the room as Elizabeth performed the most difficult part of the surgery. A few minutes later, she pulled the enlarged spleen out of the girl's stomach and dropped it into the outstretched pan. As the team began to close, Shirley spoke up. 

"So, Dr. Corday, what's going on between you and Dr. Romano?"

Elizabeth's heart jumped into her throat. She was speechless for a few seconds. "Er-er, what do you mean, Shirley?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. It's just, well, you two have been spending an awful lot of time together lately."

"No, no, Robert just needed someone to examine his arm. Nothing's going on between us."

Shirley nodded. "Okay, then. I just wanted to hear it from the source."

"Right, nothing's going on." Elizabeth paused. "Who did you hear it from?"

Shirley laughed. "Oh, you know how nurses gossip. The ER nurses are the worst. I heard it from Chuny."

Elizabeth smiled weakly. "So, everyone thinks that Dr. Romano and I are…seeing each other?"

"Well, yeah."

'Oh, God,' Elizabeth thought to herself. "Okay," she said, visibly flustered. 

Finally, the resident piped up. "Dr. Corday, I can close."

Elizabeth nodded and handed the instrument she was holding to him. "Thank- thank you," she said, rushing out of the OR and into the scrub room. As she removed her gloves and began to scrub her hands, she tried to regain her composure. People thought she was seeing Robert? 

Elizabeth finished scrubbing out and walked out into the surgical lobby. She rushed over to the elevators and jammed the down button. When the doors opened, she stepped in and waited for the elevator to take her down to the ER.

***

"Randi, where is Dr. Romano?"

"He went outside for a break, Dr. Corday. Carter needs a consult in curtain two-"

"In a minute," Elizabeth said, walking out of the ER. She turned around and nearly bumped into Luka.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Dr. Kovac, I didn't see you there," she said before rushing out of the ER.

"Where is she going?" Luka asked Randi.

"Beats me," Randi said. "But it sure seems important." Luka nodded and walked into the lounge.

***

Elizabeth found Robert sitting on a bench outside the ER, holding a cup of coffee in his right hand. When she sat down next to him, Robert turned his head. 

"You're out of surgery already?"

Elizabeth nodded. "I let Dalton close. He could use the practice."

Robert laughed. "Yes, he could. Scary, the future of surgery." He paused, but Elizabeth didn't laugh. "So, how did it go?"

"Oh, um, it went very well. Megan should be resting comfortably in recovery soon."

"Good. Still haven't gotten a hold of her parents, though."

"Well, let me know when you do, I'll speak to them about the surgery." Robert nodded.

"So, Lizzie, what are you doing here? This isn't one of your usual haunts."

Elizabeth opened her mouth, about to say something, but bit her lip and turned away. "Elizabeth?" Robert said, his voice suddenly concerned. "What's the matter?"

"It's just…well…I was talking to Shirley during the surgery." Robert nodded, and Elizabeth hurriedly continued. "And she asked if there was anything going on between us. You know, romantically."

Robert raised his eyebrows. "Romantically?"

Elizabeth nodded. "Apparently Shirley heard it from the ER nurses."

Robert laughed. "ER nurses and gossip. A match made in heaven."

Elizabeth stared at him blankly. "Robert, you don't seem to be too concerned about this."

"Well, Lizzie, what can I do? If there's nothing going on between us, we just have to let the rumor run its course. It will die out eventually, you know that."

"Yeah, but-"

"But what?"

Elizabeth looked down and shook her head. "Nothing."

"Okay then. Do you have some time to check my arm now?"

"Yeah, sure, I'll be right in," Elizabeth said, hoping that Robert would go inside and let her gather her thoughts. 

Robert realized that Elizabeth was pretty shaken up by the rumor, so he got up. "Okay, I'll get the supplies and wait for you in the suture room. Don't take too long, though, the ER doesn't stop and wait for me." Elizabeth nodded and watched him walk back into the hospital.

Why wasn't he concerned about this? Did his reputation mean anything to him? Suddenly, Elizabeth sat up. What if Robert _wanted this to happen? What if he still had feelings for her after all these years? Taking a deep breath, she got up and walked back into the ER. As she passed the admit desk, Randi called out to her. _

"Dr. Corday, Carter's still waiting-"

"Page Dorsett or Edson," Elizabeth said, walking down the hall towards the suture room. Randi sighed and picked up the phone.


	7. Insomnia Part 1: Can't Be

Author's Note: This chapter is a little bit different. It's told from Elizabeth's point of view (the next chapter will probably be a parallel chapter from Robert's POV), and it's a bit shorter. Basically, it's her thoughts about what has happened so far in the fic, specifically in the last chapter. This chapter should give you a bit of an idea of where the fic is going, so I hope you like it! Any reviews, good or bad, are appreciated (though, of course, I like the good reviews better ;). Enjoy!

***

"...bong…bong…bong" The grandfather clock in the hall downstairs chimed twelve times. It's midnight, and I'm sitting by the window in my bedroom, just thinking. I can't sleep. Every time I close my eyes, I keep reliving the day's events. Or, should I say, yesterday's events.

It's not that anything horrible happened. This certainly isn't the first rumor that's been spread about me- in fact, it isn't the first rumor about me and Robert. But somehow this one unnerved me. 

What I can't figure out is how it got started. Yes, I've been spending a lot of time with Robert lately. But I've also been spending a lot of time with Susan, and no rumors have come out of that. Besides, what's going on between Robert and me is strictly professional. I'm just trying to help with his arm.

Okay, so maybe it's a little bit more than that. It's strictly friends. God knows Robert needs more of those. He comes across as such an intimidating little man, with his biting sarcasm and inconsiderate comments. But, really, once you get to know him, he's a wonderful man. Caring. Considerate. Trustworthy. Even a little bit vulnerable. 

See, all he really needs in his life is friendship. He's never mentioned any family, he doesn't really have many other friends. And especially after his accident, he just needs someone to reach out to for help. That's who I am for him. He can come to me when he needs help. 

That's what happened on that night a few weeks ago. He needed help. I came. 

Oh God, did someone find out about that?

Suddenly, my stomach lurches. What if somebody _did_ find out about that?  I walk into the bathroom and splash my face with cool water. When the nausea subsides, I take a drink of water and return to the chair by the window.

Why should I care if someone finds out about that? It's not like anything happened that night. It was simply a friend helping out another friend. That's all it was. 

Or was it?

Oh my God, am I falling in love with him?

No, I can't be. It's Robert! Robert and I- we'd never work out. And who's to say he feels the same way I do? Who's to say I even have feelings for him? And what about Mark? I mean, yeah, he's been gone for almost a year, but still, I'm not sure if I'm quite over him yet. And if he found out I was with Robert, he'd be rolling over in his grave. But he'd want me to be happy, even if he couldn't stand the man. 

Am I really falling in love with him?

No wonder I can't sleep.


	8. Insomnia Part 2: Can't Deny

Author's Note: Well, as promised, this is a parallel chapter to the last one. Instead of Elizabeth's thoughts, these are Robert's. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews- keep them coming! Enjoy!

***

It's midnight. Why can't I sleep? Nothing too dramatic happened today. Well, I guess nothing seems very dramatic after you get your arm sliced off by a helicopter. 

Somehow, my thoughts always seem to come back to that damn helicopter. I can't help but think what my life would be like right now if I hadn't gone out onto the roof that night. Why hadn't I just called in sick? Let Luka take the chopper for his patient? Not bothered to pick up the chart?

Never mind. I know the answer. It's because I'm Robert Romano. I never pass up the chance for a good healthy argument. Or, as most people would say, I never pass up the chance to piss someone off. 

But I've been living with this stump of an arm for almost a year now. That's not what's keeping me up tonight. It's that conversation I had with Elizabeth. 

Apparently, there are rumors circulating the hospital about a possible romantic connection between us. That doesn't bother me so much. It's not the first time it's happened, but it's the first time in a while. What bothers me is that she got so worked up over it. I mean, am I really that repulsive? 

I know I'm not the most handsome of men. And having a useless piece of flesh hanging off my shoulder doesn't exactly add to my attractiveness. Plus, most people see me as a bossy, self-absorbed, arrogant surgeon. But that's not me anymore. In the first place, I can't really call myself a surgeon now. I've been holding on to hope for a long time, but I'm not a surgeon anymore. My arm's not going to get better, and I have to accept that.

And also, I know Elizabeth. And I know that she sees past my arrogant exterior. That's why we get along- she knows who I am. It's why I trust her- and only her, really. It's why I brought her over here to America in the first place.

Well, that and the fact that I was madly in love with her.

I've known Elizabeth for more than six years. You'd think by now I would have realized that she's never going to look at me the way I look at her. And when she was married, I almost got over my feelings. But now…

I can't deny that I'm still in love with her. Now, the only question is does she feel the same way? Because lately she seems to care more about me. The look in her eyes when she talks to me is different. It's not a look of pity, but of understanding and friendship. And maybe, hopefully, something more.

Could it be? Or am I just imagining things? 

No wonder I can't sleep.


	9. Uncertain Reactions

Author's Note: Okay, I'm back to my regular format :) This chapter deals with some unwritten scenes in "Foreign Affairs". Because of what happened in the episode, I thought it was necessary to introduce Dorsett as a character, but I promise he won't have that big of a part in the fic as a whole. Anyway, when you're done reading, I'd appreciate any feedback- good, bad, whatever. As long as it's constructive, it's completely welcome. Enjoy!  

***

Robert sat on the bed in the exam room, trying to distract himself. His charred arm was resting on a stand next to him, smothered in burn cream and wrapped in gauze. He kept trying to avert his gaze, but he couldn't believe what had happened. His arm had been on fire for several seconds, and he couldn't feel a thing.

For weeks he had been trying to convince himself that somehow, by some miracle or act of God, his arm would heal and he would be able to operate and live his normal daily life again. But now that his arm was burnt, more well-done than he liked his steak, he had to abandon his last shreds of hope. It wasn't getting better. He wouldn't recover. Surgery was no longer a career option.

Looking away from the pile of senseless and burnt flesh that had been the source of so many nightmares, he caught sight of the baseball player he had treated earlier in the day. Moving his arm into a new sling and pulling his lab coat tight around him, Robert got off of the bed and left the room. 

As he approached the young man and his wife, Robert fell back into doctor mode. ER doctor mode, he reminded himself. His future, if he decided to stay in medicine. 

"Well, if I'm going to be an ER doc, I'm going to be a damn good one," he told himself, and began to treat the patient. 

***

Several hours later, Elizabeth was nearing the end of a marathon surgery on a young Croatian boy with a heart defect. As she irrigated the incision, she felt a hand on hers, guiding it. She looked up into Dr. Dorsett's eyes, or rather, goggles. Blushing, she turned away and slid her hand out from under his, leaving him to finish the irrigation. 

"All right, that's it, everybody. Great work," the vascular specialist said, tying off the last suture on little Ante's chest. Elizabeth stepped back from the table, amazed at what they had done. A little boy with no apparent chance at survival was going to be okay. Soon, he would be breathing on his own, and in a matter of weeks, he would be running around and playing with his friends again. And she had been a part of it. 

She pushed open the OR doors and walked into the scrub room, where she was joined a moment later by Luka.

"So, the surgery went well then?" he asked hurriedly, glancing over her shoulder into the operating room, where the nurses were finishing up. 

Elizabeth smiled. "Yes, the surgery was very successful. Ante is very lucky that you got him here, Luka."

Luka gave a sheepish smile. "Thank you for helping, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth nodded. "It was my pleasure."

"I'm going to go call Ante's mother and find Gordona. I want to be there when he wakes up," Luka said, turning to leave. "Thank you again, Elizabeth." Elizabeth waved as he left the scrub room, then pulled off her bloodied gloves and gown and began to scrub her hands. 

A minute later, Dr. Dorsett appeared at the sink next to her. "That was fantastic work in there, Dr. Corday," he said, picking up a bar of soap and scrubbing his own hands. 

"Thank you," Elizabeth said, rinsing off her hands. "You did good work too."

"Thanks," Dorsett said, scrubbing his hands faster. There was a brief silence between them. Abruptly, Dorsett broke the silence.

"So, are you off now?"

Elizabeth hesitantly nodded. "Yes, I am. I stayed after my shift was over to do the surgery."

"Me too." Dorsett said, drying off his hands. Elizabeth began to walk out of the scrub room, and Dorsett followed her. When they came to the locker rooms, Dorsett stopped her before she could walk in. "I was wondering if you wanted to grab that cup of coffee."

Taken aback, Elizabeth turned around. "I'm sorry, I don't follow you."

"A couple months ago, take a rain check I asked you if you wanted to grab a cup of coffee, and you said some other time. I was just wondering if you wanted to get that coffee now."

Elizabeth's heart jumped. Here was Dorsett, asking her out on a date when she was so confused about her feelings for Robert. Confused if she even was ready for a new relationship. If she turned him down again, he'd probably stop asking. Was that what she wanted?

"Um, I'm not sure if I have the time tonight…" she said, planning to make an excuse to get out of it. Dorsett nodded and turned to walk away. "But on second thought, if you wait for me to get changed, I might be able to work something out," she blurted out impulsively. 

Dorsett turned around again, surprised by this reply. "Really?" he asked, still unbelieving. 

"Er, yeah," Elizabeth replied, just as surprised as he was.

"Okay then. I'll meet you out here in ten minutes?" 

Elizabeth nodded and smiled. Dorsett smiled back, and turned to walk into the men's locker room. Elizabeth pushed open the door to the women's locker room and walked inside. 'What did I just do?' she asked herself, looking at her reflection in the mirror. The Elizabeth staring back at her looked just as shocked as she felt. Quickly crossing to her locker, Elizabeth rummaged around for some good clothes and makeup. If she was going to go out with this guy, she was going to look good.

***

Robert stood on the bridge, looking down at the river, not thinking about much of anything. The cool breeze of the Chicago night was a welcome change from the busy and frantic ER. Dozens of people had walked past him in the twenty minutes that he had been standing there, but not a single one had given the lonely man a second look. 

Robert absentmindedly picked chips of paint off of the green railing, letting them float down and peacefully rest on the surface of the river. If only his life was that easy. He hadn't floated down and peacefully landed on his troubled river. He had cannonballed into it that summer night. 

Robert shifted his weight from his right foot to his left and sighed. He didn't want to go back into the ER. Not now. All he wanted was someone to talk to. But that wasn't happening right now. So he took a deep breath and let the peacefulness of the night wash over him. 

***

A/N: As you can probably guess, the next chapter is going to deal with the "Foreign Affairs" bridge scene. I've already transcribed the scene from my tape, but I won't have much time to write during the next week, so it could be a while. In the meantime, please read and review! Thanks!


	10. Giving In

Author's note: Thanks for all the fantastic reviews I got for the last chapter, they really do keep me motivated. Anyway, as promised, this is the bridge scene from "Foreign Affairs". I sat down with my tape of the episode and transcribed the scenes I used, so hopefully the dialogue is pretty accurate. The part with the medical jargon is basically made up, though, because I know nothing about the treatment of a severed arm. 

Also, this chapter is (again) a bit more focused on Elizabeth. I find it easier to write from her perspective, and at this point in the fic, I think it makes more sense to look at things from her point of view. I promise there will be more Romano in the next chapter, though. Please review when you're done reading, I'd appreciate the feedback. Enjoy!

***

Dorsett held the door for Elizabeth as they walked out of the hospital together. He followed her as she turned onto the street by the river. They walked in silence for a few moments, both enjoying the peacefulness of the night, but both unsure of what to say to the other. There was physical attraction between them, that couldn't be denied, but neither one of them quite knew how to start a conversation. 

Finally, Dorsett decided to break the ice. "How did Kovac get you on board?"

"Well, he asked."

Dorsett groaned under his breath. This was going to be harder than he thought. "Huh. That was easy." There was yet another uncomfortable silence between them. Finally, Dorsett blurted out what was on his mind. "So, what do you want to do tonight? Because, look, normally, tonight, I would just be sitting at home watching Trading Places, but fortunately for you, it's Ladies' Night."

'Trading Places?' Elizabeth laughed to herself. She was becoming more and more unsure of where the night was going. "Yeah, you're right, my daughter's waiting," she said, giving Dorsett a playful glare. She wasn't quite sure how he would react. 

Everything clicked in Dorsett's mind, and he regained his composition a split second later. "I see, well, have I mentioned how much I love kids?" The look in Elizabeth's eyes told him that she wasn't going to fall for these gimmicks. In a more serious tone, he asked her, "My car's just up the street, you want a ride?"

Grateful and taken aback all at once, Elizabeth took a deep breath. "Which way are you going?" she asked him, slowly and softly.

"I don't know, whichever way you point me towards," was his reply. Elizabeth knew that Dorsett was really interested in her, and wasn't just hitting on the closest attractive woman. She shyly looked away, and to her surprise, saw a small familiar figure leaning against the railing of the bridge.

It was Robert. 

Suddenly overcome with concern for her friend, she turned back to Dorsett. "I'm…really sorry, uh, I just…can't tonight," she said. She felt extremely guilty to have led Dorsett along, but she knew she was doing the right thing. "Can I take a rain check?"

Dorsett looked slightly hurt, but Elizabeth knew he'd get over it. He nodded, and Elizabeth gently squeezed his arm. "I promise, we'll have coffee or something. Soon. It's just…well, tonight, I have other things on my mind."

"Okay," Dorsett said. "I'll see you tomorrow, then?"

Elizabeth smiled. "Yes, I'll see you tomorrow." As Dorsett turned to walk away, Elizabeth heaved a sigh of relief. Now, at least, she had a night to sleep on things. She turned around and made her way down to the bridge where Robert was standing.

***

Robert's mind had been wandering again when he heard a familiar voice cutting through the silence. "Nice evening for a stroll," Elizabeth said in her smooth British voice. 

"Lizzie," Robert said, barely acknowledging her with his indifferent tone. 

"How'd it go with plastics?"

Exasperated, Robert blurted out, "You know, what'd Gallant do, post it on the bulletin board?" Inside, though, he was touched at Elizabeth's compassion and concern. 

Elizabeth smiled. "No, plastics consulted me. They knew I had examined your other infection."

"Well, he wants to admit me for wound care, daily debridements, and, uh, pulse monitoring, and about a week of skin graphs on the dorsen and the lower espet." Robert said. He felt comfortable about opening up to Elizabeth regarding his treatment, even if he hadn't wanted her to care for him earlier in the day. He didn't want her to see him like that- weak and ashamed. He knew she wouldn't judge him because of it, but he was still self-conscious about himself around Elizabeth.

"Well, that seems reasonable," Elizabeth said, hovering somewhere on the border between friend and physician. 

"Does it?" Robert asked. He didn't know what he had been hoping for. Of course the plastic surgeon's consult was reasonable. He had wanted Elizabeth to come up with some miracle diagnosis or treatment plan that would make everything go away, but he knew she couldn't. "I was making tea," he felt compelled to explain. "I put the pot on, I, uh, got distracted, my sling got caught on the burner, and, uh, my arm was on fire, and I didn't realize it until I saw the flames. Ridiculous."

Elizabeth seamlessly slipped into doctor mode. "Unfortunately, things like that can happen during sensory recovery," she said.

"Yeah, but I'm not recovering. I'll never get the feeling back."

Elizabeth was a bit surprised at this comment. This wasn't the Robert Romano she knew. That Robert would never give in like this. He was fiercely stubborn and would fight a hopeless battle longer than anyone else she knew. But yet here he was, basically telling her that he was giving up. 

"Robert, listen to me, just because you're discouraged, don't do anything that might cause a delay…"

Robert cut her off. "It's just going to keep going like this."

"…you can't afford to have another infection…"

"It's over."

"…compartment syndrome, vascular…"

"Elizabeth, you're not hearing me. It's over." Elizabeth fell silent, and Robert continued. "It's time for me to cut my losses."

Elizabeth was overwhelmed with an unexpected rush of emotion. Without realizing it, she had dropped her tough exterior, and Robert's words suddenly hit her right in the heart. The only person who could hold out longer than she could in an argument was giving up. Giving up his chance to fight against the seemingly inevitable. Giving up his hopes of returning to surgery. Although deep inside, she knew Robert's cause was hopeless, Elizabeth found herself unwilling to let it go this easily. 

"Robert…" she said, softly, with compassion and a hint of sadness in her voice. 

"No, we both know I'll be better off without it. You as much as said so."

"No, what I said was amputation was always a  possibility down the line, but I-I don't think that…"

"I'm very, very glad we had this chat," Robert said, silencing Elizabeth again. "Will you, uh, check the OR schedule and set it up? As soon as possible. I just want to be rid of the damn thing." 

With that said, Robert gathered his coat tighter around him and walked away, leaving a stunned Elizabeth standing on the bridge. She wanted to call after him and try to talk him out of this, but she knew it would never work. He had made up his mind, and there would be no changing it. 

Leaning against the railing, Elizabeth didn't try to stop the tears gathering in her eyes. One by one, they slid down her face and made tiny ripples in the river below.

***

A/N: Sorry, guys, I know this is depressing, but then again, the Cordano storyline on the show has been depressing. I'll try to write a happier chapter soon. Don't forget to review! 


	11. No Looking Back

Author's Note: Well, even I was getting sick of all those depressing conversations, so this chapter is definitely a bit happier. It takes place between "Foreign Affairs" and "When Night Meets Day". As always, feedback is always appreciated! Enjoy!

***

"Randi, where's my consult?" Elizabeth asked as she walked through the ER. It was unseasonably warm for early May, and her scrubs were sticking to her skin. She had only been on for two hours, but she was already counting down the minutes until her shift was over. 

"Pratt wants you to check out the abdominal pain in exam 4."

"Thank you," Elizabeth said and walked towards the exam room. Before she could enter, she was stopped by Robert.

"Elizabeth, can I talk to you for a moment?"

"I've got a consult…" 

"It will only take a minute. I promise."

"Okay," Elizabeth conceded. Robert smiled and walked towards the lounge. He pushed open the door with his good shoulder and held it for Elizabeth. 

"What is it, Robert?" Elizabeth asked. Robert waited for the door to shut before he began to talk. 

"Have you scheduled that surgery yet? That we spoke about a few days ago?"

"Uh, yeah, I checked the schedule and it looks like we can squeeze you in next Tuesday afternoon."

"Okay, that's great. I'll clear up my schedule," Robert said, glancing over Elizabeth's shoulder.

Elizabeth looked behind her, but no one was there. "Robert? Have you told anyone about this yet?"

"Uh, no, not yet."

"Robert…."

"I know, I know. I'll talk to Kerry this afternoon, and get some time off."

"You might want to think about telling some of your staff members, too. They'll have to pick up your responsibilities while you're recovering."

"I'll think about it."

"Robert, I'm serious," Elizabeth said, exasperated. 

"I know you're serious," he snapped back. "I don't want to worry the troops with the news that their fearless leader will be out of commission just yet." With that, he left the lounge. 

Elizabeth sighed and shook her head. 'At least he's feeling better today,' she thought to herself. 'He's got his biting wit back.'

***

Six hours later, Elizabeth's shift was finally ending. She sat at the ER admit desk, feet propped up on a pile of charts, fanning herself and counting down the minutes until she could finally leave. Behind her, Haleh and Chuny were gossiping, and Elizabeth was quietly catching up on the latest news. 

"Elizabeth?" 

Startled, Elizabeth hastily took her feet off of the desk, knocking over the charts. She looked up to find Dorsett looking down at her. "Do you need some help?" he laughed. 

"No, I'm all right," Elizabeth said, embarrassedly picking up the charts. "So, how are you?"

"I'm doing okay. Haven't seen you in a few days."

"I know, I'm sorry. Ella –my daughter- had a bit of a cold, so I've been at home catching up on paperwork," Elizabeth said, feeling a bit guilty. Yes, she had been at home catching up on paperwork for the past few days, but Ella's cold wasn't the real reason. After she had stood him up, Elizabeth didn't know how to face Dorsett. 

"Ah, I see," Dorsett replied. "Listen, I think we need to talk." Elizabeth nodded. "Can we step into the lounge?"

"Uh, sure," Elizabeth said, getting up and following Dorsett into the lounge. As she passed them, Haleh and Chuny stopped talking about Pratt and Chen for a moment. When the lounge door had swung shut behind Elizabeth, they had a new topic of conversation.

***

Elizabeth opened the refrigerator and retrieved a bottle of juice. She offered it to Dorsett, but he shook his head and politely refused. Elizabeth sat down at the table, facing Dorsett, who was sitting on the couch. "So, Dr. Dorsett, what did you want to talk about?"

"Well, first of all, Elizabeth, please call me Eddie." Elizabeth gave a weak smile and nodded her head. Dorsett took a deep breath. "I think we need to talk about what happened a few nights ago." 

"Listen, Eddie…"

"Elizabeth, if you're just going to give me an excuse for why you didn't want to go out that night, I don't want to hear it. I just want to know if this is going to go anywhere." Elizabeth tried to interrupt, but Dorsett silenced her. "If you're not interested, please just tell me now. It's not a big deal. I just don't want to keep going after you if you don't want me to."

'This is it,' Elizabeth thought. 'This is my chance to break it off.' For the past few days, Elizabeth had been thinking a lot about where she was in her relationships with Robert and Eddie. And she had come to the conclusion, finally, that she needed to be there for Robert. Whether it turned romantic or not, Robert was her friend, and being there for him during his surgery was much more important than starting a relationship with someone she barely knew. 

"Eddie…" Elizabeth began, trying to think of a way to tell him why she had abruptly left. When she couldn't think of one, she decided to get straight to the point. "Listen, I'm sure you're a wonderful guy, and I really would like to get to know you better, but I'm just not sure if a romance is right for us right now. Do you know what I mean?"

"I understand, Elizabeth," Dorsett said. Elizabeth couldn't read the expression in his eyes. 

"I'm sorry…"

"No, it's really okay," he replied. "I just needed to know where we were. You told me. That's all I needed." He got up and left the lounge. Elizabeth, who still hadn't moved from the chair, pulled the clip out of her hair. Her unruly auburn curls tumbled to her shoulders, and she ran her fingers through them, massaging her head. She couldn't help but wonder if she had done the right thing.

***

A few minutes later, Elizabeth emerged from the lounge. The first person she saw was Chuny, who was still giving her strange looks. "Do you know where Dr. Dorsett is?" Elizabeth asked, not caring what Chuny would tell Haleh and Lily later. 

"Uh, he just left a minute or two ago," Chuny said. Elizabeth turned, planning to follow him, when Chuny spoke up again. "With someone. That nurse from radiology."

Elizabeth spun around, her hair whipping across her face. "With someone?" 

Chuny nodded. "I'm sorry."

"I knew it, I should never have trusted him," Elizabeth muttered furiously. She felt humiliated, angry and cheated. But at the same time, she felt a hint of relief. She couldn't second-guess her decision now, and she knew that was for the best. 

Elizabeth sat down on the admit desk, still muttering to herself, when she saw Chris hurrying into the ER with Ella on her hip. Elizabeth quickly stood up again and walked over to her. "Chris, what's going on? Why are you here?" 

"I left you a bunch of messages on your phone upstairs, but you never returned them. My sister called a few hours ago, she just had a baby, so I'm flying home in an hour. I'm sorry to be leaving on such short notice, but…"

"Don't worry about it, Chris," Elizabeth said, taking her daughter from her. "Go home and be with your sister and your…is it a niece or a nephew?"

"A nephew," Chris said, smiling. "Kyle."

"Well, congratulations, Aunt Chris, and take your time out there, okay?"

"Thanks, Elizabeth. I'll call you when I get home."

"Bye," Elizabeth shouted, as Chris left the ER. Elizabeth smiled at her daughter, who replied with a huge yawn. "Are you tired, Ella?" The little girl shook her head vigorously. Elizabeth laughed, and sat down at the admit desk. Ella sleepily leaned against her mother.   

"Tough day down in the trenches, Lizzie?" Robert said, coming up behind Elizabeth. Again, Elizabeth was startled. 

"You startled me, Robert," she said, trying to regain her composure. 

"Sorry," he said, sitting down on the desk next to her. "What's going on?" he said, dropping the humor from his voice. 

"It's just been a…bad day," Elizabeth replied.

"What happened?"

"I don't really want to talk…"

"Oh, come on, Lizzie, just tell me about it."

"Well, my nanny just left for a few days with no notice at all, so I don't have anyone to watch Ella this weekend, I'm very hot, my scrubs are sticking to me, I need a shower, and Dorsett…well, Dorsett was Dorsett," Elizabeth rattled off. Robert looked a little surprised.

"Well, three patients refused to let me treat them today because I only have one good arm," he replied, incredibly serious. 

Elizabeth suddenly felt horrible. Here she was, complaining about her petty troubles, when he had to face that problem every single day. "Fine, you win," she said, trying to keep the conversation lighthearted. 

Luckily, Robert followed her lead. "So, you say you need some help looking after the munchkin this weekend?" Elizabeth nodded. "Maybe I can help out. I've got the day off tomorrow. Ella could come to my house, or I could go over to your house. Either way, I'd be happy to watch her."

"I don't know, Robert, she can be quite a handful…"

"I can handle it, Elizabeth."

"Well, all right. Thank you, Robert." Elizabeth said. She knew Robert had a soft spot for children, and maybe watching Ella would take his mind off of the impending surgery. "I'll call you in the morning so we can work out the details?"

"Sounds good. And Elizabeth?"

"Yes?"

"Why don't you go home early. I think Ella could use a nap."

"Thank you, Robert," she said, grateful for an excuse to escape. "I'll talk to you tomorrow." Robert gave a little wave to Ella and went off down the hall.


	12. Possibilities

Author's Note: Sorry for the (very) long delay in getting this chapter up- I was on vacation for two weeks, and came home to a healthy case of writer's block. But it's finally here, and hopefully the next few chapters will come a little more quickly. As far as the next few chapters go, I think there will probably be two chapters that deal with "When Night Meets Day" and then one that takes place afterwards as a conclusion. And that's it. So we're getting close to the end…

Anyway, this chapter is about Robert's adventure in babysitting. Enjoy!

***

It was 5:30 on Saturday morning. Robert's house was silent- even Gretel was asleep at the foot of the bed. Robert lay in his bed, snoring softly, with one arm propped up on a pillow next to him. Suddenly, the silence of the early morning was broken…with the ring of the telephone. 

Robert was jolted awake. His eyes still blurry with sleep, he fumbled for the phone in the darkness. Finally, he found it and slowly brought it up to meet his ear.

"Hello?" he said groggily. He wasn't good with early-morning phone calls.

"Robert? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

Robert exhaled, and tucking the phone between his head and shoulder, rubbed the sleep from his eyes. "Good morning, Elizabeth. I didn't realize my babysitting adventures would be starting quite this early."

Elizabeth laughed. "I'm sorry, did I forget to mention that my shift starts at 7?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, you did. Minor oversight on your part."

"Well, are you still up for watching Ella today?"

"Absolutely. You know kids love me."

"I'm sure they do, Robert, but do they love you this early in the morning?" 

Robert laughed. "I'm surprised that you are so witty at this hour, Elizabeth."

"It's the coffee talking." There was a pause as Robert and Elizabeth each chuckled to themselves. "So, I know this is early, but I'm going to be leaving in an hour. Do you want me to drop Ella off at your house on the way to work, or do you want to come and watch her here?" 

Robert sat up in bed and thought for a moment. "Why don't I come over there," he said. "I'm sure your house is toddler-proofed, and besides, I don't have very many toys around here."

"Okay. Can you get here in an hour? I can leave some cereal and coffee out for you."

"Sure. I'll be there."

"Thank you, Robert."

"Don't worry about it," he said, and hung up. 'What did I get myself into?' he wondered as he got out of bed and walked to the bathroom to take a shower.

***

An hour later, Elizabeth opened the door of her house to find a very sleepy-looking Robert standing on the front step. "Come in, come in," she said, holding the door for him. Robert smiled and stepped inside. 

"Looks like it's shaping up to be another warm day," Robert said between yawns.

Elizabeth laughed. "Can I get you some coffee, Robert?"

"Is it that obvious?" Elizabeth smiled. "Coffee would be great, thanks."

Elizabeth began to walk towards the kitchen, and Robert followed her. Elizabeth poured him a cup of coffee, and began to give instructions for the day. 

"Ella's not up yet, but she usually wakes up between 7 and 7:30. If you turn left at the top of the stairs, her room is the first one on the right. You can't miss it. Anyway, she likes Cheerios for breakfast, and milk. Her sippy cups are above the sink. We usually have lunch around noon- there's some leftover macaroni and cheese in the fridge. She usually goes down for a nap around 1:30 or 2. My shift ends at 4, so I'll be home around 4:30. Page me or call my office if you need anything." Robert nodded. 

"Okay, then," Elizabeth said, "I've got a meeting with Kerry first thing, so I can't be late. And thank you so much again, Robert. I really appreciate it."

"No problem, Lizzie. Now get to work. I'm a living, breathing example of what could happen to you when you get on Kerry Weaver's bad side."

Elizabeth laughed and grabbed her purse and keys from the table in the hall. "Bye!" 

"Bye," Robert shouted back, somewhat less enthusiastically. Elizabeth opened the door and walked out to her car, trying not to disturb the neighbors. 

***

An hour and three cups of coffee later, Robert was feeling awake and a bit nervous. Of course, this was not the first time he had cared for a toddler, but it was not something he did often. And if anything happened to Ella while he was responsible for her…well, the relationship he had with Elizabeth would be gone. 

"Mommy! Mommy!" came the shout from the second floor. Robert set down his coffee cup and followed the constant sound into Ella's bedroom.

"Where's my mommy?" she asked when she saw Robert walk through the door. 

"Your mommy left for work already, Ella. I'm going to hang out and play with you today, okay?" Ella looked at him, but didn't say a word. "Do you remember me, Ella?" She shook her head. "I'm your mommy's friend, Robert. I spent the night here a few weeks ago, remember?"

"Yeah!" Ella shouted. Robert laughed. "Let's get you some breakfast, huh?" Ella threw up her arms and Robert easily lifted her out of the crib with his good arm and carried her downstairs.

***

As soon as Robert opened the door, the phone began to ring. It was 11:30, and in need of some fresh air, he had just taken Ella for a walk down to the park a few blocks over. Robert quickly walked into the kitchen and picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Robert? How's it going?"

"Hi, Elizabeth."

"Is everything all right?"

"Do you have any faith in my babysitting skills?"

Sitting in her office at work, Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "I left you alone in a house with my daughter, Robert. Yes, I have some faith in your babysitting skills. I just wanted to make sure-"

"I know, I know, Elizabeth," Robert said. "Frankly, I'm surprised that you hadn't called earlier. But everything's going great."

"Oh, good. You're sure she's not too much trouble?"

"No, she's been the perfect little angel. I don't know where she gets it from."

"Ha, ha, ha."

"Hey, Elizabeth, do you want me to bring her by the hospital? We could pick up some sandwiches or something on the way. That way you won't have to worry."

Elizabeth thought for a second. After her meeting with Kerry, she had done a difficult three-hour procedure. She was ready for a break, and she didn't have anything scheduled for the rest of the day. "Actually, Robert, that would be wonderful. Not that I don't trust you or anything, but I could use some company for lunch."

"I thought so. Ella's all ready to go, because we just got back from the park, so we'll be there in twenty minutes or so."

"Sounds great."

"Oh, one more thing. Do you have an extra car seat somewhere? Because I'd really prefer to drive over there- that is, if you don't mind."

Elizabeth was stunned at his thoughtfulness. "There's an extra seat in the closet in the front hall. See you in a bit!"

"Bye," Robert said, and hung up the phone. He walked back into the hall, where Ella was sitting on the stairs, playing with her shoelaces. "Hey Ella, how would you like to go eat lunch at the hospital with your mommy?"

"Cool!" she squealed. Robert grabbed the car seat from the closet and followed Ella out to his car. 

***

"Well, Mrs. Wilson, I will talk to my colleagues this afternoon, but it looks like we should be able to schedule the surgery for late next week," Elizabeth said into the telephone. There was a knock at the door. Elizabeth cupped her hand over the phone and shouted, "Come in!" The door opened, and Ella ran into the office carrying a bag of sandwiches.

"Mommy!" she squealed, throwing the sandwiches on a chair. Elizabeth waved to her daughter, and Ella jumped into her lap. Robert, carrying a tray of drinks, kicked the door shut with his foot. He set the drinks down on Elizabeth's desk, and moving the sandwiches, sat down. 

"Mrs. Wilson, I'm going to have to call you back later this afternoon, okay?" There was a pause as Mrs. Wilson answered. "Okay, talk to you later. Bye." Elizabeth hung up the phone and greeted Robert.

"We got sandwiches from the sub shop down the street. Do you want turkey or roast beef?" Robert asked sliding the bag towards Elizabeth. 

"Turkey would be great, thanks," Elizabeth said. She turned her attention towards her daughter. "So Ella, did you have fun with Robert this morning?" Ella nodded emphatically. "What did you two do?"

"Well, we played dolls, and blocks, and we went to the park and swung on the swings," Ella said. Robert nodded in approval.

"Sounds like a lot of fun!" Elizabeth reached into the bag and pulled out a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. "Here you go, darling," she said, unwrapping the sandwich. Robert stuck a straw in Ella's carton of milk and gave it to her. 

"Well, Robert, did you have fun with Ella this morning?" Elizabeth asked, taking her sandwich out of the bag. 

"I had a fantastic time, actually. I never knew playing with dolls could be so much fun."

Elizabeth laughed, and took a bite of her sandwich. A bit of mayonnaise squirted out and landed on her cheek, but Elizabeth didn't seem to notice. After she had taken a few more bites, she noticed that Robert was staring at her. "What? What?" she asked.

"Oh, it's nothing, really," he said, but his voice gave him away. Elizabeth gave him a pointed look, and he gave in. "You have some mayonnaise on your cheek."

Embarrassed, Elizabeth tried to get it with her tongue with no success. Robert laughed and stood up. Reaching over the desk, he wiped the mayonnaise off her cheek. "Got it," he said, looking into her eyes. For a few seconds, their eyes remained locked on each other. Neither one wanted to turn away. 

Right on cue, Ella began to chatter. "Mommy, I want to play some more."

Abruptly, Elizabeth turned away. For those few seconds, the world had seemed to stop in its tracks. Everything was…well, everything was perfect. 

A smile crept across Robert's face as Elizabeth diverted her attention to her daughter. 'She didn't look away,' he thought. 

***

Just before 5, Elizabeth opened the door to her house. "I'm home!" she shouted brightly. 

Robert emerged from the living room. "Ella's still asleep upstairs," he said quietly. "She was exhausted."

"I bet," Elizabeth said. "She had quite an exciting day, and she really seemed to enjoy it."

"I thought so. I had a great time, too."

"Good, I'm glad," Elizabeth said. She smiled sheepishly. "Thanks so much again for watching her today, Robert. I really appreciate it."

"You're welcome. And any time you need a babysitter, well, you know my number."

"Thanks," Elizabeth said. 'Now what do I do?' she thought. 'Should I invite him to stay for coffee? Dinner? Or should I let him go now?'

"Well, I should go," said Robert. "Gretel can't last much longer, and I'm not in the mood to clean up any dog crap today."

"All right," Elizabeth said. Impulsively, she gave Robert a hug. He hugged back, although he wasn't quite sure what had just happened. 

Elizabeth took a deep breath in, inhaling his smell. Then she let go. 

"Wow," she said, shocked at her own spontaneity. "I, er, um…wow."

Robert smiled, and walked toward the door. "I don't know about you," he said, "but I enjoyed that." He winked and shut the door behind him. 

Elizabeth smiled and shook her head. "Yeah, I enjoyed that too," she whispered to the closed door. 

***


	13. Four Words

Author's Note: You know, it's funny. Now that I'm on summer vacation, you'd think I'd be writing a lot more, right? Sorry for the wait (again) for this chapter- I'm not as motivated in the summer as I am during the school year. 

This chapter switches between Robert and Elizabeth's point of view, but I think it's pretty easy to follow. Just in case you can't, though, it starts off from Robert's perspective and then switches back and forth at every break. And it takes place during "When Night Meets Day." We're really close to the end here, only one or two more chapters to go (I know how I want to end it, just am not quite sure how long that's going to take). Please keep reviewing, it's what keeps me going…and going…and going. Enjoy!

***

Why do hospital rooms have to be so damn boring?

Seriously, the people who spend the most time in here are either sick or dying. A little artwork wouldn't hurt. Even just changing the color of the walls would be an improvement. 

Of course, if I had my way, I wouldn't be in this hospital room anyway. But yet, here I am, just minutes away from having my arm chopped off. Again. Honestly, once was enough. 

But here I am. Alone. Well, not really alone. I know there are some doctors and nurses around, but none of them really give a damn about me. I'm just their pain-in-the-ass colleague. They're probably throwing a party tonight, just to celebrate my misery. 

Where is she? She promised she'd be here…she promised. Doesn't she know that she's the only one I care about? That I don't want her in the OR to make sure the idiot residents don't chop off my good arm…that I want her there for me. 

She's with an ER patient, they say. What ER patient could possibly be more important than me?

I know I shouldn't be this selfish. But this is hard for me. Elizabeth knows that.

So why isn't she here?

***

I can't believe I'm doing this. Sitting here, assisting on this surgery. I shouldn't have come. Robert doesn't know I'm here, so what good am I doing him?

I didn't think it would be this hard. I've done quite a few amputations in my time, but none has ever been this personal. I've never taken the time to consider how much an amputation can affect someone's life. Just look what it has done to Robert. It has destroyed his career…made him a different person, really. He may try to put up a good face, but I know how much he's changed underneath. 

They're asking me if I want to do the honors, to actually be the one to cut the arm off. Why would I want to do that? Why would I want to be the one to finalize this for him? I didn't want this to happen as much as he didn't. Yet I was the one to convince him to do it. I know, deep down, that this is the right thing for him. And I know he knows that too.

But in this moment, it all seems wrong. 

Mechanically, I'm holding out a bag, and Dr. Klein slides the now-severed arm into it. Here I am. Sealing Robert's past as I seal the plastic bag. He can never go back to who he was now.

Welcome to your future, Robert Romano.

***

Back in the damn hospital room. I don't know if it's the same one as before, though. I'm not able to focus on much of anything at all right now. 

I'm mildly aware that someone is sitting next to me, and upon asking, I realize that it's Elizabeth. I'm muttering words that I hope she can understand, because I can barely think straight. My brain doesn't seem to be functioning properly, but words are coming out of my mouth impulsively. 

Elizabeth is responding with a balance of understanding, gentleness and wit. Just what I need right now. She always seems to know what I need. She's one hell of a surgeon. And so beautiful…

I know she's taking good care of me. She always has. And she always will. She's the only one who has stuck by me, the only one who has put up with my increasingly bad attitude towards work and life in general. I don't know how she does it when nobody else seems to be able to. 

I love you, Elizabeth. I always have, and I think I always will. 

I'm slipping back into sleep, and I don't realize that I just said those words out loud. 

***

He can't have meant what he just said. I don't think he even knew that he was talking aloud. He's under a lot of stress and the influence of painkillers…it's enough to make anyone delirious.

But what if he did? What if, against all the odds, he was conscious enough to have meant what he said? 

Because when he said it, I realized that I have been waiting a long time for him to utter those four sweet words. 

"I love you, Elizabeth."

When he said that, my world suddenly came screeching to a halt. If he meant it, then my entire life has just fallen into place. 

Because I think I love him too. 

But what if he didn't mean it? What if I bring it up later, and he doesn't remember? What if he denies it? What if he doesn't want to be with me?

And, as usual, my skepticism took over. I tried to laugh it off, and left him alone in that recovery room. I did what I have done so many times before in this kind of situation. 

I ran away. And now, instead of knowing how he really feels, I'm left with my heart and brain battling it out. My brain is being the doctor, telling me that he couldn't have known what he was talking about. My heart is telling me that he feels the same way. 

This time, I hope my heart wins out. 

***

A/N: Please be sure to leave a review and tell me what you thought of the chapter- if it was good, if I wrote Elizabeth's character all wrong, whatever. Constructive criticism is always appreciated :)

Also, the next chapter probably won't be up for another week and a half or two weeks (sorry!)- I'm going on vacation again, and won't have computer access. Hopefully it will be worth the wait!


	14. I Can Feel You Falling: Part 1

Author's Note: OK, I really meant for these last two chapters to be one, but it was getting long, and I wanted to update (sorry for the delay, I've been busy with work and vacation), so this is Conclusion Part One. It takes place a few days after "When Night Meets Day," and it's the way I hope the writers and producers of ER will handle this storyline (though, of course, they probably won't mention it ever again). Anyway, I'll try to get the second part up very soon, but until then, enjoy!

***

Elizabeth woke earlier than she should have that morning. She hadn't been getting much sleep at all lately. Since Robert's surgery, he was all she could think about. How he looked so small and helpless lying in the recovery room with nothing but a stump for an arm. How he had tried to hold on to his last shred of surgical dignity by telling her how to take care of his arm. How…well, how he had told her, however groggily, that he loved her. 

That was the part she couldn't seem to forget. 

For days Elizabeth had been agonizing over the four words that had suddenly changed their relationship- even if Robert didn't know it. Now, at least, she was sure of her feelings for Robert. She knew that she was falling in love with him. She just wasn't sure if he was falling in love with her.

 Of course, she knew that once upon a time, he had feelings for her, but that was five years ago. So much had changed since then. She had gotten married, had a baby, been widowed. He had risen up the promotion ladder to the top, only to get suddenly thrown off by a freak accident. How could she hope for the fairy-tale ending now?

Elizabeth slid out of bed and stepped into the shower. She knew that she should go see him today. It had been five days since she had seen him last. He needed her, and she needed to find out what he remembered from the day of the surgery- even if she didn't want to.

***

Robert was sitting up in his private hospital room, picking at his breakfast. 'I should have paid more attention to the meal budget while I was Chief of Staff…' he thought to himself as he forced the so-called eggs down his throat. 

He was finally feeling better. Though he knew it would take time –and lots of it- to get used to his new handicapped status, he was slowly learning to function with only one arm. The IVs were out, and he wasn't in a hospital gown anymore. Though he knew he'd be in the hospital for a few more weeks, he could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Of course, there were a few questions nagging in the back of his mind. How would he be able to work? Would he get a prosthetic arm? A hook? Would anybody trust a one-armed doctor? And foremost, why hadn't Elizabeth come to see him?

Robert kept trying to think back to the day of the surgery. He couldn't remember much at all- the drugs blurred his memory. The nurses had told him that Elizabeth had scrubbed in on the surgery, and that she had taken care of him that day in recovery. One of the nurses on the ward said that Elizabeth had been there a few nights before, but had been avoiding the ward for the most part. 

Robert couldn't help but wonder if he had done something stupid while he was groggy. Or was it something else? Something he had said before he went under? Was Elizabeth avoiding him? Did she not care? Or was she too scared of what she might find if she came to visit him?

The more he thought about it, the more he wasn't sure that he wanted to know. 

***

Just past noon, Elizabeth, bearing sandwiches, knocked on the door of Robert's hospital room. Her shift started at three, and she had decided that morning that she couldn't avoid him anymore. As much as she didn't want to, she knew that she had to find out if he remembered what he had said the last time they spoke. 

"Come in," came the call from inside. Elizabeth turned the handle and put an overly enthusiastic smile on her face. 

"Lizzie!" Robert said, the glee noticeable in his voice. "You've finally come to visit. I was beginning to think you didn't care enough to come and wish me well."

Elizabeth shook her head. "I'm sorry, Robert, I've been very busy lately. I never realized how demanding the Chief of Surgery position really was. You always made it seem so easy."

"Well, according to some of my colleagues, that's because I don't care enough about the patients," Robert quipped. Elizabeth chuckled. 

"That's not true, Robert." There were a few seconds of comfortable silence. "I figured you'd be sick of the hospital food, so I brought some sandwiches," Elizabeth began. 

"Oh, thank you Elizabeth, you're an angel," Robert said, eagerly reaching into the bag Elizabeth held open for him. "I was starting to regret ignoring the meal budget all those years." 

Elizabeth laughed. "Well, I hope you don't mind having some company for lunch."

"Not at all. None of the nurses ever have anything interesting to say to me. I had more intelligent conversations with Ella last weekend."

"Well, considering the limited vocabulary of my two-year-old, I'd say the nurses are pretty boring up here."

"I'm beginning to wonder how they got through elementary school, never mind nursing school," Robert said, taking a large bite of his sub. They both laughed, and began to eat. 

***

A/N: I think the next chapter will be up within the week, but I'm not making any promises, since I always seem to break them anyway. Please review, I love feedback!


	15. I Can Feel You Falling: Part 2

Author's Note: As promised, this is the second part of the conclusion, and the last chapter of the fic. For acknowledgments, etc., see the author's note at the end of the fic. Enjoy!

***

_And all the roads that lead to you were winding_

_And all the lights that light the way are blinding_

_There are many things that I would like to say to you_

_But I don't know how_

***

Elizabeth glanced down at her watch and was shocked to see that it was already 2:30. For the past two hours, she and Robert had been enjoying a very pleasant conversation about nothing and everything. They'd talked about the weather, the finer points of a bowel resection, current events, their favorite foods, why they hated Kerry Weaver…a little bit of everything. Elizabeth took a deep breath. She had to shift the conversation to what she came here for before she had to leave.

"Er, listen, Robert, there's something we need to talk about," she began, a bit nervously.

"Go on."

"Well, what exactly do you remember from the day of your surgery?"

Robert's heart jumped. 'I must have done something really stupid,' he thought, taking a deep breath to calm himself. 'Did I try to feel her up while I was groggy?'

"Well, not much, to tell you the truth. I remember our conversation before I went under, but after that, I can't remember much of anything until Wednesday night. I was on some pretty strong painkillers, you know that."

Elizabeth's face fell. "Yes, I know that."

"Elizabeth? What's going on? Did I do something stupid while I was drugged? Because that sounds like something I would do…"

"No," Elizabeth interrupted. "No, you didn't do anything stupid. Or, well, I don't think it was stupid, maybe it was. Maybe I'm stupid for thinking…"

"Elizabeth, you're babbling. What's going on?"

Elizabeth glanced up from the bed sheet that she was unconsciously fumbling with into the probing brown pools of his eyes. She had to tell him. There was absolutely no other way. His unknown confession shouldn't have affected their relationship this much. But she let it. She let herself hold onto what was increasingly becoming false hope. 

Elizabeth let out a small laugh. "This is probably going to sound stupid when I say it, you know? It wasn't even that big a deal, really. I just built it up and now…" She stopped abruptly when she felt a hand rest gently on top of hers. 

"Elizabeth, what is it? Whatever it is, you can tell me. You know that."

"Right," she said, biting her lip and trying to piece together a coherent sentence. Just his hand on hers was enough to send shivers up her spine. "Well, I came into recovery after your surgery, and I was taking care of your arm. Do you remember that?"

Robert shook his head. "I'm sorry, I don't remember anything from immediately after the surgery."

Elizabeth quickly nodded and reluctantly continued. "Well, I did. And we had a conversation- I mean, you were out of it, of course, but you were still talking to me. You were just telling me to tie off some bleeders, and then…" Elizabeth paused for a moment, and clenched the blanket tighter in her hands. "And then you said…" She looked up at Robert, barely able to keep eye contact. 

And Robert remembered.

All of a sudden, the blurred memory of a ward flashed in his mind. Elizabeth was sitting next to him, smiling sadly and humoring his disjointed ramblings. 

_I love you, Elizabeth._

"Oh, God," Robert said, quickly looking away. "Oh, God."

"Robert, what is it?"

"I remember," he said abruptly. "I didn't before, but now…I don't know, you must have jogged my memory by talking about it…I remember."

"You, you remember?"

Robert looked Elizabeth straight in the eye. "Well, if it was something as important as confessing my love for you, I should remember, right?"

Elizabeth swallowed hard. "You do remember…" she said, as her stomach did somersaults. If he remembered saying it, could he have meant it?

"And I'm sure that you came here wondering if I really meant it." Elizabeth meekly nodded. "Because I'm sure that if I told you I did mean it, you'd just run away, because why would you possibly want to be with me? I'm a one-armed, arrogant ass of a man who can't say much else for himself. So I'm tempted to say I didn't mean it, because that way, maybe we could keep this friendship that we have, by some act of God, managed to build up." Elizabeth tried to interrupt, but Robert put up his hand and she immediately stopped talking.

"But the truth is, since we've been spending more time together, I can't stop falling. Every time you laugh, or smile, or just catch my eye, I fall a little more in love with you. I've been in love with you for a long time, Elizabeth. And when you fell in love with someone else, it was impossible for me to watch. So I tried to let go, and for a while there, I thought I had. But with everything that's happened in the past year, I wanted to fall back on something familiar. So I fell back on you, and this time, you caught me, and I fell for you all over again." Robert paused for a moment. "I know you probably don't feel the same way. In fact, you're probably disgusted with me right now, but there you have it. I've fallen in love with you, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth sat there, shell-shocked, for several minutes. She fruitlessly tried to piece everything together. Here they were, she and him, both in the same place at the same time. Both wanting the same things from each other- comfort, companionship, and ultimately, love. Both willing to try to make it work. There had to be a glitch in the plan somewhere, she thought, because there's no such thing as a real-life fairytale. 

"Well, you could say something, Lizzie. Here I've put my heart on my sleeve, and all you can do is sit there gaping like an idiot."

Elizabeth frantically tried to find the right words to say, but they weren't there. No words could explain how she felt right now. So she dropped the bed sheet, gently cupped Robert's face in her hands, leaned in and kissed him. 

And he kissed her back. 

From the moment their lips met, everything seemed right. There was passion, chemistry; an electrical bond between them that they had only imagined was there before. Elizabeth pulled away for a moment to catch her breath. She looked into Robert's eyes, and kissed him again, hungrily, passionately. When she finally pulled away and sat back down, a smile crept across her face.

"So, uh, what was that?" Robert asked, reeling with giddiness. 

"I guess that was my way of telling you that I do feel the same way," Elizabeth said.

"Could you say that again? I don't think it quite registered the first time."

Elizabeth laughed. "I'm falling for you, Robert."

It was Robert's turn to be speechless. Elizabeth picked up his hand and gently caressed it while he sat there, at a loss for words. 

Suddenly, Elizabeth's pager went off. "Damn," she muttered, as she let go of Robert's hand and reached for the beeper at her hip. "It's the ER. It's 3:00, I'm on now."

"Count on them to ruin a moment," Robert muttered. 

Elizabeth leaned in and quickly kissed Robert again. "I have to go, but I'll be back when my shift's over, okay?"

"I'm not going anywhere," Robert said. Elizabeth laughed. 

"No, I mean it. I've been waiting so long for this, and I'm not going anywhere. We can go as slow as you need to, whatever. I just want this to work out."

"Me too," Elizabeth said, smiling. "Me too." She reached for the doorknob and opened the door. "I'm covering Anspaugh's shift, so I'm not off until seven tomorrow, but I'll be back. I promise."

"I can't wait," Robert said. Elizabeth gave a little wave and left the room. 

Robert lay back against his pillow and smiled. Maybe all of this pain and suffering would be worth it if he got Elizabeth out of the bargain. Moments later, a nurse walked into the room with his three-o'clock meds. "What are you so happy about?" she asked as she offered Robert the cup of pills and a glass of water. 

"Well, it's really none of your business," Robert said between gulps of water, "but something I've been wanting for a very long time just happened." The nurse opened her mouth, but Robert would have none of it. "Don't push your luck. You're paid to take care of your patients, not to pry into their personal lives." He threw his head back and swallowed the last pill. "Thank you, you can leave now."

The nurse rolled her eyes and left the room. Robert smiled and closed his eyes. He knew what he'd be dreaming about this afternoon. 

***

Elizabeth walked into trauma 2, still smiling. "What have we got?" she asked Susan, who was running the trauma. 

"47-year-old man, passenger in an auto versus pedestrian crash, complaining of shortness of breath and intermittent right side pain…" Susan trailed off as Elizabeth began to examine the man's abdomen. "What are you so happy about?"

"Let's just say my future got a little brighter this afternoon," Elizabeth said. "Someone get me the portable ultrasound, I think we have a ruptured spleen here." Susan was smiling, still wanting more information. "I'll tell you about it later," she said as she was handed the ultrasound. 

"Okay, because I want details. This sounds interesting."

"Yeah, I think it will be interesting," Elizabeth said. "But the good kind of interesting, you know?" She put the ultrasound away. "This isn't telling me anything. Send him up for a CT."

Elizabeth pulled off her gloves and followed Susan out of the trauma room. She could feel him falling, alright. Right into her open arms. 

***

Song Info: Opening lyrics are from the song "Wonderwall" by Oasis.

Disclaimer: I don't own ER, Elizabeth Corday, Robert Romano, or any of the characters used in this story. I'm just borrowing them from Warner Brothers, NBC, etc., because they obviously don't know what the fans want to see. I also don't know anything about emergency medicine, only what I see on TV.  

A/N: Well, if you're reading this right now, thank you for sticking with this fic. I hope you guys enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Special thanks goes out to Melissa, for always encouraging me and telling me how great the story was- you have no idea how much I appreciate it. And thanks for all those cyber-coffees ;) Special thanks also goes out to Justine, my co-worshipper of all things Cordano, who has given me so much advice and encouragement about this fic (shameless plug- check out her Cordano fic "Just Visiting"- it's awesome). Thanks to everyone over at the AOL ER boards, who are always a blast to talk to, and who put up with my endless Cordano banter. And to all my faithful reviewers, thank you, thank you, thank you!

I have some ideas for a sequel fic, but I'm not sure if it will actually get written. I've got some other ideas as well, and not enough time to develop them all. So, until then, keep your fingers crossed for some season 10 Cordano lovin'!

-Katie


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